I turned 34 today ... and my boss gave me a present and then told me to pack up my stuff and go.
Funny how you get up on your "special day" excited and happy and end up in your bed, covers over your head with two cats and a bottle of wine to knock you out.
But, hear this, I AM THE GREATEST. And I believe it if even if I don't feel it.
I am the greatest because I can be knocked out but I have family and friends that love me.
I am the greatest because I am funny - seriously. I am. I can make myself snort laugh all the time. I know funny and I am.
I am the greatest because I am not afraid of spiders or cockroaches. Not many can say the same.
I am the greatest because I put a man away for over 40 years just for mugging me - you mess with the bull you get the horns.
I am the greatest because I know how to travel the New York subway system without a map! That is talent people.
I am the greatest because I have traveled to Europe and Australia.
I am the greatest because I have overcome abuse.
I am the greatest because I believe in the Universe and all God's infinite love.
I am the greatest. I am.
When you see me coming know I am.
When you see me coming know I can get knocked out but I come back stronger.
Know I am.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
All Hail The Great State of Texas
Can you smell it? AHHHHHHHHH...it is in the air. The smell of back to school, back to fall, back to school shopping sales ... AND FOOTBALL!
Oh, but it is much more than that to this Texas girl in Yankee-land. It is HOME. It is checking stats, blood pumping on game day, phone stuck to my ear as my father and I try not to cry (real) tears while we wait to see what our Number 10, 11 or 12th ranked (depending on which poll you use) Longhorns will win in the last few seconds of EVERY SINGLE FREAKING GAME. Only these boys in burnt orange can make a grown man cry on the phone to his daughter while she curses a blue streak and BEGS her team to do something - anything - that I can cram down the throats of my cubical mates.
Oh, yes, it is a thrilling time indeed. Not only do my Longhorn's take to the field but my Spurs will hoop it up once more this fall, winter and spring while I chew on my nails and coach from my couch or bar stool, instructing everyone around me not to touch me and to "Please, for the love of all that is good in this world, SHUT UP already so I can watch the game".
Up here, it is all about the Giants and the other team ... oh, the Jets! How could I forget about the Jets? That's right, I remember now, I DON'T CARE. I don't care if Manning usurped the reining kingdom of the Pats in the last few minutes of the Super Bowl - sure it was exciting - but I am living in the NOW people. I don't care if Brett Favre is going to cry up and down the field of the Jets. Get the man a hanky already.
I care about TEXAS. The sunsets, the pep rally's, the false hopes that this year will be OUR year.
In other areas, I am so glad Texas history is coming to an end. ELECTION TIME! Wahoo. No matter who wins, I will now not be greeted with "Well, obviously you support our dim witted President because you are from Texas". Really? Because I am from Texas I must be a blind sheep who does not know when a man has served his time (questionably) and it is time for him to make hay ... I mean HASTE! Run, George, Run! The sheer audacity that there will be a movie out called "W" about our current leader BEFORE he even leaves office does not escape even the most devout W. lover. Which, I am not - devoted or blind.
Yes, I am a Texan, a title which can never be stripped of me no matter my political beliefs (Democratic, baby) or my stance on thenew law passed in Texas.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26393946
It is true my friends and fellow Texans, Governor Good Hair has approved teachers to carry guns in schools. Bless his heart (that is what we Texans say when speaking of stupid or ill equipped people). I realize there have been school shootings around the country. It is something that makes me sick to my stomach - hell hath no furry as the ones left behind in a broken system.
So, after seeing this news flash and cringing that it came from Gov. Perry (of course it did) I Googled states where school shootings have occurred - and guess what? No other state that I can find has this unique law. Now, granted, I did not do an in depth search, but this commentary would stand for other states other than my own who would pass this law.
I think about police officers who are trained to fire weapons, but not just to fire them but also when NOT to fire them. How to (best case scenario) disarm a gun toting hooligan gone awry. These trained professionals in the heat of conflict often make mistakes, putting 41 bullets in an uassuming man standing on the stairs to his building in a known dangerous block of the Bronx who was just trying to show his wallet to them. Even the best of our finest can't always take in all the factors in the heat of a conflict. What makes anyone think a teacher can do better? A teacher, who is almost assuredly under paid, over stressed and scared as hell their class room will become the next target because someone got an F.
I am a dreamer, it is true. I do recognize and understand reality. I am not so high on my soap box that I cannot see the unfortunate necessity in this development. But it makes me, a dreamer, very low and sad. I know innocence has been gone from our schools for a long time, but now it is in black and white in a law in Texas that not even the Government has faith that we can make a positive difference in the lives of children.
Obviously, I have some passionate feelings on this, but I would hate to think of Thing 1 and Thing 2 going to a school where the norm is for a teacher to have a gun in the desk. What kind of message does it send? Does anyone else feel like the government might possibly be raising their collective hands in the air saying "Well, we give up".
I am over simplifying. I am not taking into consideration all of those people who would lose their lives if someone was not allowed to have the opportunity to do something before things got out of hand. But damn, it puts a pallor on my rising HOPE of a new football season. A new fall TV season. A new season of government. Or just, a new season.
I hope for better. I hope for wars to end, for people to come together and cheer a bunch of college students hoping to be the next draft pick so they can make millions play right now for the love of the game. I hope for a bunch of do-gooder basketball players to prove they are NOT old, thank you very much, and good guys DO WIN.
I hope for good roll models and bright futures.
But if all that is not possible, then I guess, I hope my child never has to go to school where weapons are the norm just because the school is 30 miles from the nearest police station and everyone has decided it is better to assume someone will need to use that gun.
But, hey, this is Texas and, apparently, we do love a good sport.
Oh, but it is much more than that to this Texas girl in Yankee-land. It is HOME. It is checking stats, blood pumping on game day, phone stuck to my ear as my father and I try not to cry (real) tears while we wait to see what our Number 10, 11 or 12th ranked (depending on which poll you use) Longhorns will win in the last few seconds of EVERY SINGLE FREAKING GAME. Only these boys in burnt orange can make a grown man cry on the phone to his daughter while she curses a blue streak and BEGS her team to do something - anything - that I can cram down the throats of my cubical mates.
Oh, yes, it is a thrilling time indeed. Not only do my Longhorn's take to the field but my Spurs will hoop it up once more this fall, winter and spring while I chew on my nails and coach from my couch or bar stool, instructing everyone around me not to touch me and to "Please, for the love of all that is good in this world, SHUT UP already so I can watch the game".
Up here, it is all about the Giants and the other team ... oh, the Jets! How could I forget about the Jets? That's right, I remember now, I DON'T CARE. I don't care if Manning usurped the reining kingdom of the Pats in the last few minutes of the Super Bowl - sure it was exciting - but I am living in the NOW people. I don't care if Brett Favre is going to cry up and down the field of the Jets. Get the man a hanky already.
I care about TEXAS. The sunsets, the pep rally's, the false hopes that this year will be OUR year.
In other areas, I am so glad Texas history is coming to an end. ELECTION TIME! Wahoo. No matter who wins, I will now not be greeted with "Well, obviously you support our dim witted President because you are from Texas". Really? Because I am from Texas I must be a blind sheep who does not know when a man has served his time (questionably) and it is time for him to make hay ... I mean HASTE! Run, George, Run! The sheer audacity that there will be a movie out called "W" about our current leader BEFORE he even leaves office does not escape even the most devout W. lover. Which, I am not - devoted or blind.
Yes, I am a Texan, a title which can never be stripped of me no matter my political beliefs (Democratic, baby) or my stance on thenew law passed in Texas.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26393946
It is true my friends and fellow Texans, Governor Good Hair has approved teachers to carry guns in schools. Bless his heart (that is what we Texans say when speaking of stupid or ill equipped people). I realize there have been school shootings around the country. It is something that makes me sick to my stomach - hell hath no furry as the ones left behind in a broken system.
So, after seeing this news flash and cringing that it came from Gov. Perry (of course it did) I Googled states where school shootings have occurred - and guess what? No other state that I can find has this unique law. Now, granted, I did not do an in depth search, but this commentary would stand for other states other than my own who would pass this law.
I think about police officers who are trained to fire weapons, but not just to fire them but also when NOT to fire them. How to (best case scenario) disarm a gun toting hooligan gone awry. These trained professionals in the heat of conflict often make mistakes, putting 41 bullets in an uassuming man standing on the stairs to his building in a known dangerous block of the Bronx who was just trying to show his wallet to them. Even the best of our finest can't always take in all the factors in the heat of a conflict. What makes anyone think a teacher can do better? A teacher, who is almost assuredly under paid, over stressed and scared as hell their class room will become the next target because someone got an F.
I am a dreamer, it is true. I do recognize and understand reality. I am not so high on my soap box that I cannot see the unfortunate necessity in this development. But it makes me, a dreamer, very low and sad. I know innocence has been gone from our schools for a long time, but now it is in black and white in a law in Texas that not even the Government has faith that we can make a positive difference in the lives of children.
Obviously, I have some passionate feelings on this, but I would hate to think of Thing 1 and Thing 2 going to a school where the norm is for a teacher to have a gun in the desk. What kind of message does it send? Does anyone else feel like the government might possibly be raising their collective hands in the air saying "Well, we give up".
I am over simplifying. I am not taking into consideration all of those people who would lose their lives if someone was not allowed to have the opportunity to do something before things got out of hand. But damn, it puts a pallor on my rising HOPE of a new football season. A new fall TV season. A new season of government. Or just, a new season.
I hope for better. I hope for wars to end, for people to come together and cheer a bunch of college students hoping to be the next draft pick so they can make millions play right now for the love of the game. I hope for a bunch of do-gooder basketball players to prove they are NOT old, thank you very much, and good guys DO WIN.
I hope for good roll models and bright futures.
But if all that is not possible, then I guess, I hope my child never has to go to school where weapons are the norm just because the school is 30 miles from the nearest police station and everyone has decided it is better to assume someone will need to use that gun.
But, hey, this is Texas and, apparently, we do love a good sport.
Monday, August 18, 2008
What I did on my summer vacation by HB
Remember in elementary school when you had to stand up in front of the class and recite everything you did on your summer vacation? (Or if you were "that girl", like me, the ONE thing you did on your summer vacation besides sit in front of the TV eating Spaghetti-O's)
This summer has seemed a bit elementary to me. Given the fact that everything I do makes me turn around in search of a gold star to signify "Job Well Done!"
It has been a busy summer, what with the move into the apartment, the two new men in my life (remember, "crazy cat lady" here) and the addition of AC into my apartment. What a roller coaster. (BTW, went to 3 Home Depot's for this AC and finally found it in the middle of Queens where - and I have never seen this before since living in the New York area - the homes have actual LAWNS! I mean, they have to mow them ... crazy stuff! I was so far out, when I asked for a taxi to take me and my new air conditioner home, the woman had to call HER MOTHER to find out if taxi's run in the area. They do not. Car services do and that is how a black Lincoln Town Car took me and my new AC back to the non lawn care world of Sunnyside)
The cats have made themselves at home. Both are novice plumbers. They are intrigued with all things in the bathroom. Where does their kitty litter matter go when I flush it down the toilet? How does the water come out of the sink when I magically tell it to? And what is down the drain of the bathtub? I swear, it is like having my own crack team CSI Unit in the bathroom every signal morning.
In my non-cat life, I have been walking for the Breast Cancer Walk and in between I got the brilliant idea to run a 10K. Sometimes I wonder just who is in control of my brain. Clearly it is not me. I have not run anything since I ran away from my mugger in LA almost 10 years ago. But am trying hard. I run every morning and walk every weekend and somehow I have lost weight even though I continue to eat everything in site and still love beer.
I also still do not own a TV. Those of you who know me well are tired of hearing of this. You think I am some superior than thou person but really, I have just gotten used to it. I know, weird. I love TV. But since I moved in, there has just not been a reason to buy a TV and now I think, what is the point? It has gone on this long.
So what I really did over my summer vacation is read - a lot. I have read so many books that I have banned myself from buying anymore and now have my very own library card.
Here are some of my favorites:
The Host: Stephenie Meyers
Twist at the End: Steven Saylor
Big Stone Gap: Adriana Trigiani
This Charming Man: Marian Keyes
Breaking Dawn: Stephenie Meyers
Love the One Your With: Emily Griffin
Time and Again
1000 Splendid Suns
Power of Now: Tolle
Certain Girls: Jennifer Weirner
Skinny Bitch
Ten We Came to the End: Joshua Ferris
Wake Up, Sir!: Jonathan Ames
Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell: Susanna Carke
There are actually more, but you get the idea ...
I have also discovered new and interesting ways to entertain myself. For one, I spy on my neighbors. I call the guy across the way "Single Guy". He likes to cook in a variety of outfits. His boxers and T-Shirt, a suit -with jacket on- in a towel and in jeans and a tank top. This was all very amusing until I discovered "Single Guy" is not one guy. There are two of them. I guess they are related because I cannot tell them a part, even with binoculars.
The other entertainment I subject myself to is trying to understand the little old lady named Ursala who sits out on the park benches in front of the building. She lives here but she looks homeless. If I am sitting on one of the two benches available, no matter what I am doing (like talking on the phone) the woman will sit RIGHT NEXT TO ME and start talking to herself. This cries of a lonely person, I know. I sometimes talk to myself, but not in public and I certainly do not sit down next to someone to hold my own private conversation. Try as I might though, I never understand a word of the conversations we do have - not the ones in her head - and she never remembers me each time we see each other. But then sometimes, I am not sure the cats would remember me on a daily basis if I did not feed them regularly.
And so, that is what I did on my summer vacation ... gold star anyone?
This summer has seemed a bit elementary to me. Given the fact that everything I do makes me turn around in search of a gold star to signify "Job Well Done!"
It has been a busy summer, what with the move into the apartment, the two new men in my life (remember, "crazy cat lady" here) and the addition of AC into my apartment. What a roller coaster. (BTW, went to 3 Home Depot's for this AC and finally found it in the middle of Queens where - and I have never seen this before since living in the New York area - the homes have actual LAWNS! I mean, they have to mow them ... crazy stuff! I was so far out, when I asked for a taxi to take me and my new air conditioner home, the woman had to call HER MOTHER to find out if taxi's run in the area. They do not. Car services do and that is how a black Lincoln Town Car took me and my new AC back to the non lawn care world of Sunnyside)
The cats have made themselves at home. Both are novice plumbers. They are intrigued with all things in the bathroom. Where does their kitty litter matter go when I flush it down the toilet? How does the water come out of the sink when I magically tell it to? And what is down the drain of the bathtub? I swear, it is like having my own crack team CSI Unit in the bathroom every signal morning.
In my non-cat life, I have been walking for the Breast Cancer Walk and in between I got the brilliant idea to run a 10K. Sometimes I wonder just who is in control of my brain. Clearly it is not me. I have not run anything since I ran away from my mugger in LA almost 10 years ago. But am trying hard. I run every morning and walk every weekend and somehow I have lost weight even though I continue to eat everything in site and still love beer.
I also still do not own a TV. Those of you who know me well are tired of hearing of this. You think I am some superior than thou person but really, I have just gotten used to it. I know, weird. I love TV. But since I moved in, there has just not been a reason to buy a TV and now I think, what is the point? It has gone on this long.
So what I really did over my summer vacation is read - a lot. I have read so many books that I have banned myself from buying anymore and now have my very own library card.
Here are some of my favorites:
The Host: Stephenie Meyers
Twist at the End: Steven Saylor
Big Stone Gap: Adriana Trigiani
This Charming Man: Marian Keyes
Breaking Dawn: Stephenie Meyers
Love the One Your With: Emily Griffin
Time and Again
1000 Splendid Suns
Power of Now: Tolle
Certain Girls: Jennifer Weirner
Skinny Bitch
Ten We Came to the End: Joshua Ferris
Wake Up, Sir!: Jonathan Ames
Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell: Susanna Carke
There are actually more, but you get the idea ...
I have also discovered new and interesting ways to entertain myself. For one, I spy on my neighbors. I call the guy across the way "Single Guy". He likes to cook in a variety of outfits. His boxers and T-Shirt, a suit -with jacket on- in a towel and in jeans and a tank top. This was all very amusing until I discovered "Single Guy" is not one guy. There are two of them. I guess they are related because I cannot tell them a part, even with binoculars.
The other entertainment I subject myself to is trying to understand the little old lady named Ursala who sits out on the park benches in front of the building. She lives here but she looks homeless. If I am sitting on one of the two benches available, no matter what I am doing (like talking on the phone) the woman will sit RIGHT NEXT TO ME and start talking to herself. This cries of a lonely person, I know. I sometimes talk to myself, but not in public and I certainly do not sit down next to someone to hold my own private conversation. Try as I might though, I never understand a word of the conversations we do have - not the ones in her head - and she never remembers me each time we see each other. But then sometimes, I am not sure the cats would remember me on a daily basis if I did not feed them regularly.
And so, that is what I did on my summer vacation ... gold star anyone?
Friday, August 1, 2008
Crazy Cat Lady = 1 Married with Children = 0
For those of you with bets on crazy cat lady, your odds just increased. I adopted two kittens this past week and am having a lot of fun getting to know them and all their shenanigans.
Both are boys, so in theory, I am surrounding myself with males so maybe the Universe will yield a human male for me. I know, that is already crazy cat lady talk ... it happens so fast.
Regardless of my status, I will share that both boys are healthy and almost 4 months old. My friend was going to take them to a shelter since she is no where near crazy cat lady status and so I took them in. They are brothers, although they look nothing alike and act nothing alike.
The grey one is Pagoda, and he is shy and timid but WANTS attention, just does not know how to ask for it yet. So he follows me around and stares at me and generally I end up scratching his ears with my arm extended as far as it will go while he simultaneously backs up but also squints and purrs. He is a mess.
The orange one is bigger and has a fat little belly. He knows how to ask for attention, no problem. Walks right up to me and rolls over and I rub his belly. He likes to be talked to and enjoys all of the toys I have bought him. His name is Royal and he is so the "king" of the house already. Thankfully Pagoda follows Royal around and is learning to be just like him so it is only a matter of time before both of them are ruling my house.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
you snooze, you get rested
Hello dear readers,
I have been away awhile, I know. Nothing is more telling of my absence then the fact that this blog site has changed its password requirements and now you must have a Google account to use it. Fortunately, I do have a Gmail account, since working at the software company has forced me to open three new accounts ... yes, three. They all have the same password as I cannot be asked to remember that many accounts, so if you are with the FBI, CIA, or just a close friend you can easily hack into any of my accounts. YEAH technology!
I have been away so long that to catch you up in brief is impossible, of course most of you would all agree for me to be brief in general is an impossibility.
I finally moved into my very own apartment again. Thank the Maker! I do appreciate my friend's kindness to allow me to sleep on her couch the last, what, 4 months? Let me tell you, for a girl who has not seen HER bed in almost a year's time, that couch is something special. Very comfy. Especially since my friend does not sit on it sometimes because it is so beautiful, I was more than just touched she would allow my entire body to lay on it every night.
My new place is stellar. Truly a little hotel room haven. If you are ever in the tri-state area, you cannot stay with me, but there is a great La Quinta down the block and we can meet for coffee at the The Grind and act like you are actually my house guest! Yes, it is that small. Sometimes I wonder how to get away from myself.
It also has no AC and did I mention the elevator is in repairs. But like all things in NYC, this place is the "up and coming" building to be in ...HA!
I do have a lot to say, but I feel I have neglected my cast of characters from my old blog "Love you, Mean it" - the original. So how about a round of applause for those I terrorize and idolize on these humble electronic pages:
SNL - my sister-n-law, who I stalk constantly because she is the coolest person I know
Thing 1 - my 7 year old niece
Thing 2 - my, recently, 4 year old niece
BFAM - my "brother from a another mother", Travis
Ang - my H-town BFF, who coined the phrase, Love you, Mean it
Kimbo - my Seattle BFF, who is the mother I aspire to be
Non nicknamed folks, who totally wish I would hide their identity:
My mother
My father
My brother
Charity - WOAI's co-anchor for the #1 news talk show in the morning - SA in the HOUSE
Biko - my brother and SNL's dog
Bagherra - my brother and SNL's other dog
Catty - above mentioned fish
and Me, of course ... every stupid thing I think or say eventually ends up here when I have time.
That's the "cast", I have plenty others you will meet, like my gay boyfriend, and The Russians, but for now that is enough.
As I sit here, melting in my fabulous New York apartment made for Stuart Little, I am still wondering, "What would Oprah do" and "Why are there so many stupid people in the world?"
A few tips from me to you:
See: The Dark Knight - run, don't walk, don't complain to me about any part of it, just watch it and be in awe of the geniuses at work on this film
AND The Closer on TNT - so good
Read: The Life of Pi and On Green Dolphin Street, Google the titles, I can't do everything for you
Listen to: Cold Play Viva la Vida
Skip: PS I love You, ok, it is probably already too late, but if you have not seen it yet, just don't. I know I am a chick and should say it is good, but really. 300 had more romance in it for me and at least then Gerard Butler wasn't just phoning it in
Later guys and dolls
xo
HB
I have been away awhile, I know. Nothing is more telling of my absence then the fact that this blog site has changed its password requirements and now you must have a Google account to use it. Fortunately, I do have a Gmail account, since working at the software company has forced me to open three new accounts ... yes, three. They all have the same password as I cannot be asked to remember that many accounts, so if you are with the FBI, CIA, or just a close friend you can easily hack into any of my accounts. YEAH technology!
I have been away so long that to catch you up in brief is impossible, of course most of you would all agree for me to be brief in general is an impossibility.
I finally moved into my very own apartment again. Thank the Maker! I do appreciate my friend's kindness to allow me to sleep on her couch the last, what, 4 months? Let me tell you, for a girl who has not seen HER bed in almost a year's time, that couch is something special. Very comfy. Especially since my friend does not sit on it sometimes because it is so beautiful, I was more than just touched she would allow my entire body to lay on it every night.
My new place is stellar. Truly a little hotel room haven. If you are ever in the tri-state area, you cannot stay with me, but there is a great La Quinta down the block and we can meet for coffee at the The Grind and act like you are actually my house guest! Yes, it is that small. Sometimes I wonder how to get away from myself.
It also has no AC and did I mention the elevator is in repairs. But like all things in NYC, this place is the "up and coming" building to be in ...HA!
I do have a lot to say, but I feel I have neglected my cast of characters from my old blog "Love you, Mean it" - the original. So how about a round of applause for those I terrorize and idolize on these humble electronic pages:
SNL - my sister-n-law, who I stalk constantly because she is the coolest person I know
Thing 1 - my 7 year old niece
Thing 2 - my, recently, 4 year old niece
BFAM - my "brother from a another mother", Travis
Ang - my H-town BFF, who coined the phrase, Love you, Mean it
Kimbo - my Seattle BFF, who is the mother I aspire to be
Non nicknamed folks, who totally wish I would hide their identity:
My mother
My father
My brother
Charity - WOAI's co-anchor for the #1 news talk show in the morning - SA in the HOUSE
Biko - my brother and SNL's dog
Bagherra - my brother and SNL's other dog
Catty - above mentioned fish
and Me, of course ... every stupid thing I think or say eventually ends up here when I have time.
That's the "cast", I have plenty others you will meet, like my gay boyfriend, and The Russians, but for now that is enough.
As I sit here, melting in my fabulous New York apartment made for Stuart Little, I am still wondering, "What would Oprah do" and "Why are there so many stupid people in the world?"
A few tips from me to you:
See: The Dark Knight - run, don't walk, don't complain to me about any part of it, just watch it and be in awe of the geniuses at work on this film
AND The Closer on TNT - so good
Read: The Life of Pi and On Green Dolphin Street, Google the titles, I can't do everything for you
Listen to: Cold Play Viva la Vida
Skip: PS I love You, ok, it is probably already too late, but if you have not seen it yet, just don't. I know I am a chick and should say it is good, but really. 300 had more romance in it for me and at least then Gerard Butler wasn't just phoning it in
Later guys and dolls
xo
HB
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
What Would Oprah Do?
I am by nature a selfish person. In fact, the show I most identify with is "The New Adventures of Old Christine" because it is like looking into a mirror at times. The main character is so hysterically self absorbed it is really laughable ... until you realize, um, that is me!
In one laugh out loud, if you have not seen it, download it NOW, episode, Christine decides to give all her problems to the universe and ask "What would Oprah do?"
This spurred me to ask myself "Self, what would Oprah do?
And so, this is how the obsession with all things Oprah began for me. I used to not be much of a fan. Every book she chooses is sad. Every show she does is sad. And don't even get me started on her "Favorite Things" list ... which is only good if you are a freaking millionaire like her!
But then I picked up a little book called "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle and took the online course Oprah and Eckhart hosted and I saw Oprah in a different light. A good light. A "I don't care if she is a millionaire and has a solid gold toilet, she is doing good things for this world" light.
After reading and absorbing the book, instead of myself, I began my new mantra of "Give it to the Universe" because I figure, why just wonder "What would Oprah do?" and just do what Oprah is doing ... ?
Easier said than done.
When I am on the train and someone decides to take up two seats, smashing me into the wall and cutting off my air supply due to their body odor, I try to "give it to the universe".
When I am in line to check out at the grocery store and a woman cuts in front of me and then pretends she does not speak English, I try to "give it to the universe".
When I am paying $4.99 for milk, I try to "give it to the universe".
When I drop my tooth brush on accident in to the toilet, I try to "give it to the universe."
When I don't pay attention to the cross walk and almost get run over ... OK, that one is my fault. The universe shouldn't take the hit.
But I think I have made my point ... and although I am still reasonably selfish and make really stupid mistakes just about every single day ... I take comfort in the fact that I try to give it to the universe.
When that doesn't work, I turn on the TV to find out "What would Oprah do?"
In one laugh out loud, if you have not seen it, download it NOW, episode, Christine decides to give all her problems to the universe and ask "What would Oprah do?"
This spurred me to ask myself "Self, what would Oprah do?
And so, this is how the obsession with all things Oprah began for me. I used to not be much of a fan. Every book she chooses is sad. Every show she does is sad. And don't even get me started on her "Favorite Things" list ... which is only good if you are a freaking millionaire like her!
But then I picked up a little book called "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle and took the online course Oprah and Eckhart hosted and I saw Oprah in a different light. A good light. A "I don't care if she is a millionaire and has a solid gold toilet, she is doing good things for this world" light.
After reading and absorbing the book, instead of myself, I began my new mantra of "Give it to the Universe" because I figure, why just wonder "What would Oprah do?" and just do what Oprah is doing ... ?
Easier said than done.
When I am on the train and someone decides to take up two seats, smashing me into the wall and cutting off my air supply due to their body odor, I try to "give it to the universe".
When I am in line to check out at the grocery store and a woman cuts in front of me and then pretends she does not speak English, I try to "give it to the universe".
When I am paying $4.99 for milk, I try to "give it to the universe".
When I drop my tooth brush on accident in to the toilet, I try to "give it to the universe."
When I don't pay attention to the cross walk and almost get run over ... OK, that one is my fault. The universe shouldn't take the hit.
But I think I have made my point ... and although I am still reasonably selfish and make really stupid mistakes just about every single day ... I take comfort in the fact that I try to give it to the universe.
When that doesn't work, I turn on the TV to find out "What would Oprah do?"
Monday, June 2, 2008
Two Boobs Take A Walk
I know it has been a while, and for all of my 4 readers, I do apologize, but I have been very busy. Between starting my new job and finding an apartment and trying to figure out my blackberry (which I have hard erased twice) I have not had a lot of humor to share.
All that is about to change because my friend and I are walking the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer in October and we are really scared!
Seriously, I have wanted to do this for a long time but when I went to the sign-up meeting and registered it did not hit me I would be walking 40 miles until I left the meeting. 40 miles. In two days. In New York. In October. What was I thinking?
I could have just donated money to this cause and been done ... but for one person in my life who won her battle with breast cancer - my Grandmother. Lorraine Welch of Friona, Texas beat her odds and therefore I can walk 40 freaking miles by golly!
So, I have started training. Which consists of me getting on a treadmill and walking for 3 miles at 4.0 speed 1.0 incline. At the end of this 45 minute session of hell, I am dead tired and sweating like a hog in Texas heat. It is not pretty. And that is 3 MILES PEOPLE!
I have made a 6 mile walk, outside on a beautiful day. I made it in 1.5 hours, crossing two bridges and several lanes of traffic. It wasn't so bad really. But the next day ... uh, yeah, the next day had me sitting in a cold bath downing aspirin and asking for mercy.
On the plus side, I have new acne from all of the excess sweat and I have new blisters on my feet from my new walking shoes. The only thing missing is chaffing but I am sure that is to come...
Stay tuned loyal readers ... this could get messy.
If you would like to make a donation or know of someone who would like to donate, please see below:
Thank you for your support; you really do make a difference. Click here to visit my personal page.If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:http://info.avonfoundation.org/site/TR/Walk2008/NewYork?px=4157589&pg=personal&fr_id=1660&et=txz_eGJX6VUPMVoydvaZYw..&s_tafId=283185 Click here to view the team page for Texas Ta-Tas Take ManhattanIf the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:http://info.avonfoundation.org/site/TR/Walk2008/NewYork?team_id=54920&pg=team&fr_id=1660&et=Hohsd45LaGiZ4virNS84OQ..&s_tafId=283185
All that is about to change because my friend and I are walking the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer in October and we are really scared!
Seriously, I have wanted to do this for a long time but when I went to the sign-up meeting and registered it did not hit me I would be walking 40 miles until I left the meeting. 40 miles. In two days. In New York. In October. What was I thinking?
I could have just donated money to this cause and been done ... but for one person in my life who won her battle with breast cancer - my Grandmother. Lorraine Welch of Friona, Texas beat her odds and therefore I can walk 40 freaking miles by golly!
So, I have started training. Which consists of me getting on a treadmill and walking for 3 miles at 4.0 speed 1.0 incline. At the end of this 45 minute session of hell, I am dead tired and sweating like a hog in Texas heat. It is not pretty. And that is 3 MILES PEOPLE!
I have made a 6 mile walk, outside on a beautiful day. I made it in 1.5 hours, crossing two bridges and several lanes of traffic. It wasn't so bad really. But the next day ... uh, yeah, the next day had me sitting in a cold bath downing aspirin and asking for mercy.
On the plus side, I have new acne from all of the excess sweat and I have new blisters on my feet from my new walking shoes. The only thing missing is chaffing but I am sure that is to come...
Stay tuned loyal readers ... this could get messy.
If you would like to make a donation or know of someone who would like to donate, please see below:
Thank you for your support; you really do make a difference. Click here to visit my personal page.If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:http://info.avonfoundation.org/site/TR/Walk2008/NewYork?px=4157589&pg=personal&fr_id=1660&et=txz_eGJX6VUPMVoydvaZYw..&s_tafId=283185 Click here to view the team page for Texas Ta-Tas Take ManhattanIf the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:http://info.avonfoundation.org/site/TR/Walk2008/NewYork?team_id=54920&pg=team&fr_id=1660&et=Hohsd45LaGiZ4virNS84OQ..&s_tafId=283185
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